I think that Jason has a lot to do with it. Jason works a normal person's hours. I work all the hours he works and THEN I also work evenings and weekends.
I still work evenings and some weekends, but I'm really trying to make a conscious effort to free up the time that he's not working (it's easier, given the nature of my many jobs), and I will try to do this even more during the first year of our marriage.
I want to give us the time to grow in our marriage, to work through what many people say is the toughest year. How can we do that if we're only together when we're sleeping?
So, I've scaled back on what I'm doing. This fall, I'm substitute teaching (more on that in a sec), caroling again (yay!) and teaching two acting classes. That's it. Any more than that and I'd miss all those important moments of being a newlywed. I won't let my work take that away from me!
What's so interesting about my decision to scale back is that my primary source of income, substitute teaching, has suddenly become totally unreliable. I have had one - ONE! - sub call since school started this fall. This is very unusual as I sub in two school districts, and have always had enough work to keep myself afloat financially.
Now? Thanks to more teacher cuts in the school districts, there is now a "must call" list of laid-off teachers who must all receive their jobs before any other subs get a call. I feel badly for those teachers who were laid-off, I do, but share some work, please! I rely on sub work for a regular paycheck (everything else I do pays sporadically).
This morning, there was no sub call again. I'm starting to get very concerned. I have two weeks of availability left before I take off for our wedding and honeymoon, and if I don't get any work between now and then, I will not receive ANY paychecks before November. WHAT?!
When we chose our house to rent, we chose it knowing that if I had a month of no work that we'd be able to make it, paying rent and all of our bills on Jason's salary. That doesn't make me feel okay about not contributing, but it does put my mind at ease.
Back to the point - I've gone from a workaholic to a person who is actually happy to be given the excuse to spend the day at home "puttering". I define "puttering" as cleaning and gardening at my own pace with little breaks to just relax.
Today I've puttered - the house is spotless and I spent a good hour and a half doing my favorite thing - gardening. :) I still feel guilty for not contributing financially today, but at least I contributed in another way! If you had told me ten years ago that I'd be happy spending the day at home cleaning, I would have told you you were nuts. Today? I'm no longer a workaholic, and I'm coming to realize that there are things that are more important than work and being busy.
Back to my garden!