And then we moved to Florida, and I started working again. I began to realize that there was a market for ME - that just because I don't look like Jessica Alba doesn't mean I can't work. That just because I'm not Melissa McCarthy funny that I can't make people laugh.
2013 has been a time of rediscovering what I CAN do, instead of beating myself down for not being "good enough".
So - when we closed NUNSENSE last weekend, I sat down and started to evaluate what I had learned from revisiting Sister Mary Amnesia.
Before I go into this list, though, please know that I am not being cocky. I am confidently stating the things that I remembered that I do well. And God knows that there is a difference between confident and cocky.
I learned from a singer friend of mine (whom I really respect) that I have a much better voice than I give myself credit for. I am never going to be able to scream it out like Idina Menzel - that is not the voice I was given - but my voice is MINE and it's a good one. I should be proud of it and have confidence in it!
I re-learned that I am funny, and that I have a gift for physical comedy. That if I relax, and have fun, and don't try to work so hard that people will laugh. And they will laugh hard. I had comments from audience members (who continued to come back) that I reminded them of Kristen Wiig (of Bridesmaids) and Bernadette from The Big Bang Theory. Such compliments, and a reminder that just because I don't do stand up doesn't mean I'm not funny. I will be pursuing more comedic work, or just creating my own.
And I re-learned that I LOVE to entertain. I remembered how powerful it is to have an audience in the palm of your hand - to know that they are taking your journey with you, and are so in tune with what you are doing that you can make them laugh hard with just a grin. How incredible it is to know that you have brought so much joy to their lives for two hours - that no matter what they are going home to, they had two hours of solid laughter with some tears mixed in. Laughter truly is the best medicine, you know.
So - I'm aggressively re-evaluating my plan and figuring out where it takes me next. My new mantra: Confidence is not cockiness. Be confident in your skills, and go use them, just don't be an a-hole. ;)
I can't wait to see what happens!
|Hamming it up with the audience as Sister Mary Amnesia.|
Production Photo courtesy of TheatreWorks Florida.